Newsweek

Artilce in Newsweek (26/11/2022) on my career, the cost of living crisis and the impact it has on dating and relationships:

My career began over thirty years ago after gaining my Masters degree in social work at Sussex University. After graduating, I did all sorts of different things. I was a musician for several years; working as a jazz pianist while building my career in academia at the University of Richmond in London. I taught philosophy, which in my view, is pretty aligned with psychotherapy.

Liz Earle Wellbeing Magazine

I write in the Liz Earle Wellbeig magazine (September/October 2022), on 3 myths in relationships:

A good couple relationship should be fun, and enhance each partner’s individual growth. In the search for a relationship like this, there are several unhelpful myths which can trip us up. Here are three of them:

Liz Earle Wellbeing Magazine

I write in the Liz Earle Wellbeig magazine (July/August 2022), about recovery from affairs:

Affairs are like hand grenades under relationships. When you discover your partner has been unfaithful, the empty- stomach feeling can completely disorientate you. Someone once

described it as like being a five-year-old in a supermarket with Mum and Dad: you look up, and – they’re gone! You feel an overwhelming sense of panic and disbelief. Safety and security vanish in a dreadful instant. There’s a sickening sense the world will never be the same again.

Liz Earle Wellbeing Magazine

I write in the Liz Earle Wellbeig magazine (May/June 2022), about loss of libido:

It’s easy to feel a sense of failure in a couple relationship when sex slows down, stalls or stops. Surely, if we love each other, this side of things

should be easy, natural – and frequent? What if I rarely feel like sex with my partner – does this mean the relationship is dead? What if they want it and I don’t?  Far from being uncommon, these are questions almost all couples ask at some point.

The Romantic Myth Of Making Love

Delivered to the UKCP (UK Council for Psychotherapy) Conference in December 2018.

In this paper I argue that the romantic idea of sex as an expression of love, leads, very often, to a sense of confusion, frustration and failure in couples. I explain why this idea doesn’t work, why we nonetheless hang on to it, and propose a slightly different way of thinking about sex in long-term relationships.

Simply Women & Home

I appear in Simply Women & Home magazine (September 2021), as a guest therapist answering questions about "The Sandwich Years':

If your teens were tough, and your 20s like anawkward episode of Sex and the City, you might have expected midlife to be a breeze. But coping with adult children’s struggles while juggling the needs of elderly parents can test us like never before. Instead of shifting down a gear, we may be faced with our offspring’s failure to launch and parents’ declining health.

The complaint contract

It is unwise for the therapist to assume that every couple who comes for therapy wants change. It is often the case that a couple want, instead, ...

The paradox of marriage

Long-term relationships are built on a paradox - not one we often talk about, or warn our teenagers about, but we should. The paradox, put simply, is that one ...

Sex, fun & growth

Long-term relationships should offer each partner two things. The relationship should feel like the best place for individual growth. And it should be fun.